Life is a Teacher, Are you listening and taking notes?

Bad things happen …

Life is also about the things you don't like

Why does bad things happen to not so good people? Sometimes I know the answer to this question, but whatever may the answer; there is only truth I take with me.

I take the truth that life is a constant teacher. It forces us to stop and reflect.

One such reflection was something on the notion of my view of body. I rest in the believe of the sacredness of the body. Our body is not merely a vehicle but also a home we rest in. 

Consumeristic side of culture 

Wisdom is waiting to be heard

The consumeristic side of culture may turn it into some kind of idol for worship. Let me confess I have fallen for this wrong idea.

While looking back at my Google photos I realised that I have been living with a poor notion of myself.

Having children had given me a Dad bod but not accepting myself was not a motivation but an excuse to feel bad.

People playing God

Sometimes we may be carving our own misery rather God actively doing so.

Yes, I have started paying attention to my body and working on keeping it healthy. But this experience has thought me to take care of myself by a healthy Self acceptance.

Why is this so important Chris? I would answer that by saying that the way we see ourselves and accept ourselves may be the way we see others.

In Conclusion

Do Bad things have only side to it? Are they only filled with pain and emptiness?

Bad things can teach us how to stop and pay attention to things we thought were under your control.

They challenge you and keep you alert. Don't let them overwhelm you.

Breathe, Stop and Learn... Life is a teacher and it teaches you.

Thank you for your time and stopping by! If you have questions you want me answer you can frame your question as mail and send it across.

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Short Guide: Letting go of pain when you feel stuck in a Situation

Hey! I missed you guys this week. My son was down with high fever. Thank goodness he is better now.

This week has been crazy, life can get you stuck sometimes. It was an opportunity to use what I preach and write about. 

I practiced a lot of stuff (Self help related, of course). I got back to researching theology and philosophy. I can spend hours studying these topics (Whilst spending time baby sitting etc.)

At some point of time we all feel let down by life or ourselves and it may not even be these things it could be a terrible situation that gets us stuck. 

For me it was my child' s health for others it may be a relationship or something else. How do we deal with these situations?

(Maybe)You can pray these away, but I will share with some powerful ideas I found out.

Here are some points I tried:

Accepting the present situation

Could this situation be an opportunity?

Accepting a situation comes when we are present and aware of what is going on. We don't need to decide the outcome mentally. It can be stressful and we may not make the best of the moment we find ourselves in.

You have options

You choose and don't let the situation dictate your choice

Do you think you are cornered or you have hit a wall? That can be a difficult situation. I have been there, I can share with you how I dealt with the problem.

I try looking at the situation objectively. Taking a note of the possible outcomes. Speaking with a friend or counsellor has personally helped.

Journaling the journey

Journaling is awesome...Write your own story!

I journal using my mobile phone. I have my phone with me all the time. Why not use it to write a note or two. It has really been useful. 

When I want to review or check how I felt at a particular situation I just browse through my notes on phone. It is that simple. If you are concerned about privacy just use an app locker.

Meditate or pray your tensions away

Lol... Ignore the Brand Mantra part

I am not trying to evangelize or anything. I think it is practical and it works. Personally, I just tune my thoughts out and close my eyes, I just lose myself in the moment, just focusing on my breath. 

It is s a relaxing experience. It refreshes me and feel energized. I pray too, it connects me with my higher purpose and puts things into perspective. 

Conclusion 

I believe life happens to all of us and we all face situations that can cripple us. 

But being there for others and yourself is important. Self care is also important to you and it can help others. 

I would like to leave you with this quote from my Twitter Feed.

Choose to percieve your situation differently, limitations are signposts leading you to focus on your strengths.#nolimits #motivation #selfhelp #chriseducator

— Christopher Dias (@Kiss_toff) October 17, 2021

I wish you an awesome week ahead and the very best. Do consider subscribe to our Newsletter... See you guys in the next blog post.

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Source: https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1526948128573-703ee1aeb6fa

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Public Speaking is about your Audience

Hey Chris!, You must be born a great speaker. You just speak your mind, Gosh! How do you do that? I have heard many comments and candid confessions from near and dear ones.

But as most of them know, It was not easy for me. In my College days, I was good Catholic boy (Now I am good catholic man with a small 'c')

I was a volunteer  at the local prayer group. We use to participate in cultural activities and interact with families.

When our prayer group shifted to another part of the city, our Prayer leader decided to connect with local schools and the local church community.

We gave presentations and I would just volunteer (mostly ushering people and smiling when needed). One day my Prayer Leader asked me to give a 45 minutes talk on the importance of the Holy Rosary.

I started collecting all the books available on Public Speaking. I was not prepared for it.

So I started reading up books on Public Speaking and books on the Rosary. I thought that I would be able to speak when the time was right.

I practiced in front of the mirror and I thought I was going to be okay. When the day had arrived I just couldn't open my mouth.

I picked up some courage and I spoke. I spoke all the information I knew and guess what I managed to speak for only 10 minutes.

What was going to happen for the next 35 minutes? What was I going to say? I just excused myself and moved away.

At that moment I thought 'flight' was a better response than other alternatives. I thought it didn't make sense to deal with a situation I never knew how to manage.

A decade later I was ready to lecture and speak with confidence. I was able to share my ideas and opinions.

Public Speaking can be difficult for the unprepared

This confidence and transition was not some kind of miracle. It was the result of an effort.

An Effort to achieve a Goal to change. Did I attend a course or read a book?

I did both and they helped me tremendously. But it was also the constant push and desire to make something happen.

A lot of times we think that things will miraculously change if you read a book or join a course?

Things will change, but it might only mean having more information about the strategies and techniques.

By themselves Strategies and techniques are not enough. One needs to also practice and be open to making mistakes.

One thing I learnt from the Bad Experiences I had with Public Speaking. They teach you a lot about yourself and people.

After the bad experience I had as a young College Student. I remember friends and people coming up to me and encouraging me.

Thinking about it I realized that your audience wants you to do a good job and are most willing to support you. Though sometimes it may not seem like that.

There are different kinds of people and we need to accept that reality. 

So Here are some Pointers I think beginners need to know about Public Speaking that I learnt.

#Number 1: Respect your audience

I remember people telling me to treat your Audience is like Pumpkins. Besides being a  horribly bad advice I think it is not true.

The audience might have people who are masters on the topic you are covering. When you respect your audience you mentally treat them as partners or participants rather than just a spectator.

Your Audience is giving you their attention; ask a marketer or salesman and they will tell you the value of attention.

It is a wonderful opportunity to share what you know and learn. When we share we explore ideas as a community.

I believe Public Speaking is a two way street. The Speaker uses primarily words to communicate and the audience uses body language, reactions etc.

#Number 2: Prepare well

It is an amazing experience Researching, it is like an adventure.

We live in an information age. There is an abundance of good information.

Preparing well would mean to me; Researching well.

Sifting through information you judge relevant to your audience or Topic at hand.

It is an amazing experience Researching, it is like an adventure.

One question opens up like a proverbial can of worms. You begin to see how an idea can be applied or is applied in various contexts and situations.

So Preparing well will also include writing your ideas and presenting them in a way that is coherent.

You can share a handout or some notes from what you have spoken to your audience in a digital format.

We live in a digital age, connecting and sharing good content is highly valuable.

#Number 3: Believe in yourself

Leaders are made

This is a line that is overused. I think but we all (at times) don't grasp the meaning of it in our hearts or we just take ourselves for granted.

We have tremendous potential to create something amazing. Look around and see all the great services and products you use.

They have been made possible by someone who believes in their own abilities to share something valuable to the world.

When you are engaging in Public Speaking you are sharing a part of you with others.

#Number 4: Practice well

Your audience wants you to succeed

You don't need to just practice in front of a mirror. I will throw a wild guess here, You have at least more than 10 friends on Facebook.

Request them to be your audience and review your talk. You could use those pointers in your presentation.

Go on Twitter and share your ideas. This will help you prepare better material.

There is no Rules here, You can be creative here. Practicing means more than memorizing lines.

It also can mean delivering better content.

#Number 5: Research on the topic

Public Speaking can be more than sharing information

You consider this as a Point connected to Preparing well.

But I include it as a separate pointer to emphasize this important aspect of Research.

It focuses on dealing with a problem or issues.

You must decide clearly what you want to share with the audience. Do you want your Presentation to be informative, entertaining or anything else?

This will set the tone for the way you collect material and deliver it.

#Number 6: Speak on what interests your Audience

Chris, How would you know that? If you have prepared well ask them directly. Then craft your presentation to what you and your audience have decided.

You can also interview the organizer or speak to some members of the audience before you  deliver your presentation.

You could also check online forums and groups for the topics that interests people.
You will get a lot of insights into topics that interests people.

Google search, Quora, Reddit or even Facebook groups are a great place to get great insights.

What is stopping you from getting insights about your audience? If you are wrong about it. 

Not an issue, as you have list of topics you can focus on (for your presentation).

#Number 7: It is not about you

The purpose is to express

In Conclusion

We engage in Public Speaking everyday. We just don't realize it. In our offices when we speak to our teams, in Parties and other social situations.

We think that Public Speaking is limited to the Podium or Stage. In a way it is and it is not, What matters here is what you want to share.

I hope this post finds you good health and do share your thoughts on our FB Page.

You can subscribe to our Newsletter, I send you updates on the blogs I share and other ideas. You can click here to join.

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Every dog has his day (Sometimes to get their backsides kicked)

When I was in College the fear of Public Speaking would really grip me. I would dread speaking in front of people.

It was horrible and I had the most terrifying experiences to tell you the least. But Today things are different.

I still have fears I need to deal with. Public Speaking is no longer a Fear rather now its more of a profession.

When you actively try working towards solving Problems, the chances of success grows. If you are Lucky the magic happens.

As an Educator we get a lot of Appreciation and Feedback. One thing I realized is that Receiving Feedback is an art as much as giving it.

There are different kinds of People (We all know that right!), But when you experience it as a Speaker it is a different experience.

There are people who will like what you say and those that just Troll you because they can.

Critiquing and Peddling Bullsh*t

I have read and watched a lot of Movie Reviews and I have a close friend who does it Professionally.

As a Movie buff we can sometimes be overly critical. But just think about it, we are only criticizing them as outsiders.

We don't know the efforts or the amount of Work these artists put into working on themselves and delivering a Performance (Whether Good or Bad).

Here comes the Critics, They are professionals who understand Cinema and the other practical aspects like Trade, Genre, technical work etc. etc.

As an Educator we have our own Lot of Critiques & Critics, Some may be even unqualified and still feel like they have the right to give their feedback (which is great) but unfounded Bullying is what I feel is disgusting.

I think Bullies whether in work, relationship or leisure is just a source of pain and frustration. They are unrequired attention seekers trying to feel important.

The worst part is when they justify themselves. You encounter these bullies not just in work or Cinema, You experience them in Relationships too.

They and their Enablers will go to any length to believe their Bullsh*t. They use self deception in a way that is Self Destructive.

In all this the victim suffers unnecessarily (in most cases these victims don't stand up for themselves and thus enables the whole situation Tacitly, my two cents)

The Art of Not Trolling

The Importance of a Good Critique

Now for the Real Critic. A good critique has tremendous value.

You have an expert that shares valuable feedback.

It can be harsh sometimes but the value can be immense.

Let us take an example to understand this better.

We all have taken up some kind of sport or new Hobby at some point of time.

But we do need some coaching and support. Even If you are better than your team mates and people you know there is always some room for growth.

This is where a good critic comes in, he or she will evaluate you and your performance keeping in mind much broader parameters.

We can then use that information to improve our game. Credibility and right feedback are so important.

At some point of time, we all need some amount of healthy feedback. 

But Yes, Feedback can be unhealthy as well.

Good Pariahs vs Bad Ones

Self Respect and Tolerating Bullies

So you must have guessed somewhat my opinion. I think there is no reason to tolerate Bullying, disrespect or injustice of any kind.

Overlooking it is a part of the problem. We tend to overlook a lot of important issues till they become a problem for all.

I think bullies are not limited to Schools and Colleges they are there in your workplace, homes and neighborhoods too.

Don't be an Enabler and get manipulated into Helping these people. They need help of their own.

In Conclusion

I think that things will change gradually and being a part of a Positive development (Anti Bullying, Anti-Body Shaming etc.) is indeed something to treasure.

I hope this article encourages you to take a stand or at least introspect on the issue of Mental abuse, Trolling and Bullying. 

Our world has seen enough of pain, we don't need more of it.

Thank you for your time. Do subscribe to my Newsletter!. Catch you in the next post! Ciao!

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Motivational quotes to push you to Success

We all need a little push. A little nudge to push us ahead.

In Conclusion

I am sure you found these quotes interesting. I also know that you would be having a different take on each of them.

My aim is not to be pushy but to encourage you. Each one of us have a unique situation.

But we all need encouragement. I hope you found this post interesting.

Catch you in the next post. Do join me on my FB page to discuss these quotes.

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