The Art of Ignoring 'barking dogs'; How to choose your critiques? Critiquing is an art and not a pariah trick

 

Every dog has his day (Sometimes to get their backsides kicked)

When I was in College the fear of Public Speaking would really grip me. I would dread speaking in front of people.

It was horrible and I had the most terrifying experiences to tell you the least. But Today things are different.

I still have fears I need to deal with. Public Speaking is no longer a Fear rather now its more of a profession.

When you actively try working towards solving Problems, the chances of success grows. If you are Lucky the magic happens.

As an Educator we get a lot of Appreciation and Feedback. One thing I realized is that Receiving Feedback is an art as much as giving it.

There are different kinds of People (We all know that right!), But when you experience it as a Speaker it is a different experience.

There are people who will like what you say and those that just Troll you because they can.

Critiquing and Peddling Bullsh*t

I have read and watched a lot of Movie Reviews and I have a close friend who does it Professionally.

As a Movie buff we can sometimes be overly critical. But just think about it, we are only criticizing them as outsiders.

We don't know the efforts or the amount of Work these artists put into working on themselves and delivering a Performance (Whether Good or Bad).

Here comes the Critics, They are professionals who understand Cinema and the other practical aspects like Trade, Genre, technical work etc. etc.

As an Educator we have our own Lot of Critiques & Critics, Some may be even unqualified and still feel like they have the right to give their feedback (which is great) but unfounded Bullying is what I feel is disgusting.

I think Bullies whether in work, relationship or leisure is just a source of pain and frustration. They are unrequired attention seekers trying to feel important.

The worst part is when they justify themselves. You encounter these bullies not just in work or Cinema, You experience them in Relationships too.

They and their Enablers will go to any length to believe their Bullsh*t. They use self deception in a way that is Self Destructive.

In all this the victim suffers unnecessarily (in most cases these victims don't stand up for themselves and thus enables the whole situation Tacitly, my two cents)

The Art of Not Trolling

I thinking Trolling must be fun. I have never done it. But I have had a few encounters and they were not very good.

They were with some Religious Fundamentalists on Facebook. The whole experience besides being annoying; is plain disgusting.

There must be some kind of fun these Trolls enjoy. So how does one not Troll and have valuable engagements.

I think first would be to understand the Psychology and the reasons behind their action. Is this the kind of leisure one wants to engage in? Does this kind of engagement add value to anyone? How does it make the world a better Place?

Yes, The last question is also important. We can't pull this question out only when there are major calamities or Tragedies. Minor abuses and harm also carry the potential for major Tragedies.

The Next thing we should look into methods and Triggers that push our buttons. Keeping a Track of these hot issues will help us keep this tendency under control.

I think lastly trying to understand the people we disagree with. I think irrespective of People's IQ they have reasonable reasons behind their actions (Including Trolls, Just that they don't know otherwise).

The Importance of a Good Critique

Now for the Real Critic. A good critique has tremendous value.

You have an expert that shares valuable feedback.

It can be harsh sometimes but the value can be immense.

Let us take an example to understand this better.

We all have taken up some kind of sport or new Hobby at some point of time.

But we do need some coaching and support. Even If you are better than your team mates and people you know there is always some room for growth.

This is where a good critic comes in, he or she will evaluate you and your performance keeping in mind much broader parameters.

We can then use that information to improve our game. Credibility and right feedback are so important.

At some point of time, we all need some amount of healthy feedback. 

But Yes, Feedback can be unhealthy as well.

Good Pariahs vs Bad Ones

I don't believe all Trolls are bad or malicious. Some might be just jiving in to enjoy the experience, sadly at the expense of another.

They are not actually good, but in their own eyes they think so. There is nothing called a Bad or Good Bully (in my opinion).

It is basically demeaning (act) and it treats another person with lack of respect and charity.

So the so called Good and Bad pariahs fall in one category.

Self Respect and Tolerating Bullies

So you must have guessed somewhat my opinion. I think there is no reason to tolerate Bullying, disrespect or injustice of any kind.

Overlooking it is a part of the problem. We tend to overlook a lot of important issues till they become a problem for all.

I think bullies are not limited to Schools and Colleges they are there in your workplace, homes and neighborhoods too.

Don't be an Enabler and get manipulated into Helping these people. They need help of their own.

In Conclusion

I think that things will change gradually and being a part of a Positive development (Anti Bullying, Anti-Body Shaming etc.) is indeed something to treasure.

I hope this article encourages you to take a stand or at least introspect on the issue of Mental abuse, Trolling and Bullying. 

Our world has seen enough of pain, we don't need more of it.

Thank you for your time. Do subscribe to my Newsletter!. Catch you in the next post! Ciao!

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