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What does Self Love actually mean? 10 Key Strategies to use Self Love in your daily life

May 15, 2022
New Beginnings have a charm of its own...feel great and completely fulfilled

Introduction

When you start something new things can be exciting, but you can also have some temporary challenges that you are very well prepared and excited to deal with.

New Beginnings have a charm of its own, we put ourselves completely into it. We feel great and completely fulfilled.

But sometimes routine can be perceived to be something bad (I love routine though), we can feel left out or uncared for. 

Our closed ones can be there but we  can feel we need to be understood more or something like that. I think in moments like this we need to be there for ourselves.

We need to love ourselves and accept the way we are. All our good, bad and ugly sides,  we may not be perfect. But we can accept and love who we are completely and perfectly. 

What is Self-love? What it is not?

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I have had my own share of a testimony but I would rather keep it for some other time. Personally I realized that to build self confidence and belief in self also means a certain level of self care.

How could one love oneself If it was without accepting the self? Of course I knew my negatives. I mean how I failed living to the ideals I think are important in my own perception.

At some point dealing with the negatives within and outside myself became a tug of war. Over a period of time I realized that there was grace in a healthy self acceptance. 

Sometimes in the quest for becoming better we turn more saccharine. 

It not only hurts us but actually is less authentic (in my view). I am not saying you don't need to improve but one cannot change without first accepting the way things are.

I like the way the Brain and Behavior foundation describes it a blog, "Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth."

Our actions should support who we want to be rather than becoming an unhealthy critic of sorts.

How can it help you?

I think the first thing that comes to my mind is that it will help you move away from an unhealthy kind of perfectionism.

I think that this kind of Perfectionism is actually inauthentic and doesn't take into account the reality of things. It puts a lot of burden on the individual and may be others.

I do believe constantly trying to build self and improving ones life if accompanied with the reality that we all have areas we struggle with, seems more authentic to me.

You must check this article on the importance of Self Love by Medical News Today.

10 ways to get started with loving yourself



via GIPHY

This is Chris Educator's Amazing List of Loving yourself (LOL)

Believe me I practice most of these:

1. Remove the toxic people from your life

This is the first and most powerful hack I can give you. 

I am not encouraging you to be judgmental. But just that sometimes we don't gel fit well with people.

You don't need to be nasty about it, Just start by being assertive and valuing your time and space.

2. Keep time to Destress yourself

I don't know what your belief system is. But we all live one Life at a time.

We all want to give the best to people and things we love.

All that is only possible if we keep time to destress ourselves. Of course all Stress is not bad.

Just keep the bad ones away.

3. Fulfill your Dreams(Side Hustle)

We all have dreams but there are practicalities we need to deal with. We may even love what we do, but a lot of us have dreams we would love to fulfill.

Believe me it won't happen if you don't work on it. You can start it as a side hustle.

Starting a Side Hustle is also a form of Self Love. You actually start working on what you have been relegating to a just a dream.

You Side Hustle may work or not, but it will teach you a lot.

4. Document your thoughts

Your thought life is also you. You need to note your insights and dreams.

Feel free to note all the things you are sad about or even thankful for.

Review your journal and don't just write and forget. If you think you would want to share it with others, you can start blogging or micro blogging about it.

5. Practice Awareness

Life is much more than you are aware of. Intentionally Practice Awareness in your daily life.

I have blogged about it, you can check some of my blogs on this.

6. Read your Gratitude list

Firstly maintain a Gratitude list. You can journal about the things you are grateful for and read them regularly.

7. Accept yourself

Of course you know you are not Mr./Ms. Perfect. So accept the parts of you that are not so good. 

8. Find your tribe

You can't gel with everyone. Follow the first tip and fire the toxic people if possible, next hangout with people who share the things you find amazing.

9. Practice Forgiveness

Besides forgiving yourself, I am sure there are many people who have wronged you. It may be easy for me to write it but it can be difficult for you to forgive some people. But It can be very caring to yourself to forgive the people who have hurt you.

10. Manage your Time

This one is last on the list but is extremely important. Practicing Time management is extremely valuable and important skill.

Managing your time is extremely caring thing to do. You don't need to spend yourself saving the world around you. Even Superman needs some time off.

Conclusion

6 more tips to complete this Challenge

I would like to conclude these thoughts with a Challenge. You see challenges every day, I am not going to ask you to dance or forward this article ( Though I wish you would), But I want to Challenge you to do something new each week.

A new act or habit that encourages a healthy for form of Self Care. You can  start by taking 1 idea from the 10 I shared and start.

You don't need to follow my list, you just need to begin. I hope this article finds in the best of health.

Thank you for your time and see you in this next post.

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Fresh Update: What's been happening lately with Chris? 3 Key Takeaways from my new stint

April 29, 2022

What's been happening lately.....?

Oh Gosh! Been such a long time. Where have I been? I must write this as an update. I have spent time with my other love, Course Creation. 

Now, I create courses around Management and Marketing for Universities (besides Blogging & Coaching).

It's been great getting back to the 9to5 grind. I know and have read a lot of articles speaking negatively about it. I don't share the same ideas. 

I think depends on many factors like life and career goals, personal ambitions, etc.

I am writing to share some lessons I have learned from this process.

Lesson #1 Get used to the Grind


Initially, any change seems difficult to manage. 

Imagine starting out a new project, Things may not work as seemed or expected. 

I think this is quite a normal experience, but I also think exaggerating the pain and change is something negative. We must learn from the experience, cry sometimes, or console ourselves when things get worse.

I believe having a vision can help us focus better and deal with difficult situations or even change.

Lesson #2 Never give up on trying

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I believe there are appropriate situations when you have to dump a project, but most of the time we must not make excuses. 

Moving on and giving our best every time is the way to go.

If you don't know something, learn it, if you need help, network and get it. 

I believe the best choice is to give your best.

Lesson #3 Value the platform

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As an experienced Freelancer, I really value the 9to5 grind. I see it as an opportunity to give my best and upgrade myself with new experiences and interactions.

A lot of times when things go unexpectedly bad, we look at the negative side of things. 

We must also practice timely exercises on Gratitude.

In Conclusion

I would like to thank you for the support you guys have been giving me.

Please share your experiences and do subscribe to my Newsletter.

Thank you for your time, Ciao!


A personal story on dealing with excessive anxiety + 2 Key Pointers on dealing with it the Right way

March 21, 2022

If you are feeling overly anxious, I can understand how it feels


Deep Pain and an empty feeling

Imagine waking up one day and feeling low for no reason. Walking to the bus stop and your mind brings to you all the worries of the world. You know it is all exaggerated but you just can't help it.

Your church buddies don't get it, they think you are turning into some kind of Job and God is testing you. You are not able to concentrate on your job. You just feel horrible.

This is how I felt years ago, I was lecturing and in the middle of the lecture I had to leave. I needed to take a break I just couldn't think. It felt like there was a black hole in the center of my chest. It felt really hopeless. I had to tell my Head of Department about it.

Getting the right kind of Support

Get the support from people who care


She was really kind and she connected me with a Doctor. It was a life changing experience. I was suffering from Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

It a treatable disorder, and I so grateful and thankful to my HOD. She was a savior.

It is amazing how sometimes in spite of our Education we fail to take care of ourselves. I wonder why is it so.

Do we think it is a taboo and people will shun us and laugh at us? Is neglecting yourself spiritually sound and sensible? Is it a lack of faith?

What I think about GAD and 2 Pointers

Use Rationality and sensible thinking for Self Care


To me it was like any other disease. We must be rational and sensible. Taking care of ourselves is important if we want to work on our goals and dreams.

Detours are a part of the journey and so are setbacks. We must deal with them and we don't need to do it alone.

I would to share here a lot of tips and strategies, But I will only share 2 Pointers here.

1. Speak to someone who cares

2. Seek medical help

There are people who care for you. But Everyone also has things they are dealing with and so if some fail to get what you are going through it is okay. 

The next point I would like to mention is Professional Help is important. Although you can get some really helpful ideas from various resources getting the right help is key to better health.

I would encourage to take self care seriously and especially mental health.

In Conclusion

Emotional Health and Self Care are important


Taking care of yourself is a journey and an important part of achieving your Goals. We must expect the unexpected at times.

Having a balanced lifestyle is important to you and the people you influence.

Professional Medical Help is important for proper self care. I hope I have been able to enrich you through this post.

Do like and share you ideas on this topic? You can join the discussion on my FB Page.

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How to make this New Year awesome? 5 Key Insights to better Resolutions for this New Year

January 01, 2022
How to make this New Year Count?


 It is a new day, a new moment and a New Year. The Previous year has been filled with joys and lessons of its own.

Besides growing a year older, it brings a lot of hope and aspirations that are waiting to be fulfilled.

Resolutions and promises are waiting for their execution. I personally can get quite superstitious about the 1st of January.

But this year I am not going to buy into that obvious lie. For me, this is the year of Slaying BS. I am going to focus on cutting out things rather than only fulfilling my New Year's Resolution.

Some Areas of Focus


It is easy to think that Self Development is only about you. I think this is farther from the truth. It is also about community and people.

If you ever wondered why people join cults or keep bad company, besides feeling good they are looking to better themselves.

I think New Year's Resolution is a way of expressing it. Rather than dismissing the whole exercise, we must write some of the things we would like to achieve in the coming year.

Don't look at them as targets but choose to accept them as aspirations. They are no longer just targets you desire but desires that seek to be a reality.

Areas such as Health, Public Image, Finances, etc. are some places we can work on.

Enablers vs Empty Routines


I am sure you have heard me promote Journaling and Affirmations. I believe these are tools that enable us and remind us of what we need to focus on.

Focus is the main game,  there are a lot of people and things vying for attention. I think it is also important to bring in some enthusiasm, it makes the routine more fun and filled with a healthy passion.

Just doing activities may bring some amount of results, but sustainable results are something we all want.

Having the right kind of situation may not always be possible. Sometimes we need to take control and make things a possibility in the light of change and dynamic situations.

Developing a System that works for you

All Routines are not empty, I think only those that are not connected to some goal or personal joy are.

It is important to work on a system. Systems work together to achieve a focused task, Think of a clock. So many working parts and one goal,  telling you the Time.

We can break down our goals into tasks that work together as a system. Of course, using and modifying the system would be essential.

Think of them as updates on your Mobile phone, we plug the gaps and improve the working of your device. Similarly, we can modify the system we create to help ourselves.

Oh, it may not work, Yes that is a possibility. But think about it you are working on your goals and taking concrete steps towards fulfilling your aspirations or goals.

Using Patience

Being Patient is sometimes the only resort. We must build it up as a part of our usual routine.

It is also a reminder we don't need to get it right the first time. In some cases, we may also need to seek help from others in fulfilling certain goals.

Be Patient and give yourself a chance. Be that Boss you always wanted. The one that motivates you and understands you too.

Lastly, learn from others

Competing with yourself is all good. But what's wrong with raising your standards and learning from others.

You can broaden your (mental) horizon by looking at things from another person's point of view.

Competing with self has its limitation and why be limited.

Concluding Thoughts

I would like to conclude by wishing each one of you a very Happy New Year. May you truly have a fulfilling and joyous year.

Thank you for the constant support and time you take to read my thoughts. Do share it with others.

Remember it's your Year, your time and your response. See you in the next post. Ciao! 

Dealing with the reality of Self Employment; 9 to 5 is not bad

November 26, 2021

Self Employment is not all fun and party
Photo by William Fortunato from Pexels

Self Employment was always not a choice for me. I loved teaching and working with young bright minds.

They are full of life and curiosity. If there is one thing you must know about me, I really love knowing answers to questions that ring in my head.

I never stop till I get the right one. It just keeps on hitting my head and I just start spending precious time getting the answers.

Self Employment can really limit that, and when it is coupled with Parenting (God Bless you) it can be difficult.

But for many Self Employment is a choice and it something they really enjoy.

But I don't think that 9 to 5 work is necessarily a bad option.

Job sucks? What!

Check out some of our Products


You must not be thinking critically if you think that Self Employment is easy.

I have heard a lot of people tell me that, but what they don't tell you that one can try a part-time gig too.

You don't need to leave your current job. It really is unnecessary, unless if that's what you think is right for you.

On a personal level, I think Self Employment encompasses many roles. You are just not the guy repairing the Computer or creating that website, you are also the person actively marketing yourself and innovating your game.

People will only see one part of the picture, I believe there is more to it. When you are working at a job certain aspects are taken care by others.

You get a platform to show case your best. When you are Self Employed you got to work on developing a platform that is relevant to you and the industry you are working with.

Thank Goodness for the Internet

I think internet is the best thing after vaccines (Lol, a lot of anti-vaxxers are going to hate me for this one).

Besides all the wrong information and fake news, you get to share what's on your mind and how you feel.

It helps you network with people and get quality material too. Whether it is prospecting and selling it is competitive but much more comfortable in a way.

I must say there is a lot I need to learn but I think it is worth it. The internet has introduced me to many quality people and ideas that have helped improve the quality of my life.

Before taking the plunge

I am not going to share here some Iron clad Rules that are unbreakable. But I think they are useful.

It is both the things I have actually used and the things I have not done. Let me jump into some of them.

Rule 1: Manage your resources well

Money is an important resource and when used well the another powerful resource called time it can be powerful.

Time we all get and have using it well is key to business or self development. I have personally found it useful attached a vision or purpose to it.

It gives it a direction and goals to make the journey more meaningful. It helps us fight unnecessary distractions and journeys that can take us off tangent.

I believe as a Self employed Professional using various strategies we can multiply our resources.

For example, If we are trying to multiply Time we can simply outsources some of the work and work on the parts we have a mastery over.

When it comes to money we can employ wise and judicious strategies to invest our money.

Rule 2: Build your skillset

A good vision and strategy can fall short in the absence of a poor skillset. Skillset primarily comprise of hard and soft skills.

Developing these skills is essential to working successful projects. I think it essential to build and continuously sharpen our skills or at least acquire skilled talent from the marketplace.

Going Self Employed does not mean you have to do it alone. You can work with other freelancers and businesses to help you with your projects.

Rule 3: Build a Personal Brand

I believe Personal Brand is like Self Help with a bit of Marketing thrown in for good measure.

It can be a really powerful mix. As a Professional who is into Solopreneurship working on yourself and building Goodwill can help you move far ahead.

Personal Branding will help you showcase the best of  'You'. This will help be ahead of your game and beat the competition.

I think it is very necessary to build yourself as a Professional especially as a Self Employed Professional

Conclusion

Feel free to share your experience. If you have any questions do reach out to me. I would like to stress one thing before I leave you.

Appreciate your journey, Don't be to hard on yourself if have been dealt by life a Sh*t sandwich. Self Employment is a journey.

All journeys are not the same, People will support you and some won't, I think that is a part of the learning process.

Let me leave you with some recommendations on Resources you could use on this new journey.

Resources

Crucial Steps to Start a Business

Books to move quickly to your next Project

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A Personal Journey on dealing with the agreeable and disagreeable parts; Learnings from this October'21

November 15, 2021

 

Learnings from this October'21

Adventures and detours sometimes feel the same, but there is a huge difference between bumping onto an unplanned journey and following an intentional path.

The month of October (P.S: and the first half of November too) has a month of great learnings for me at a very personal level, I think there is great value in standing up for your own truth.

I do believe in an objective truth, but I think that life sometimes offers you a representation of it and not the whole picture.

When we are on a personal journey for self development we need to beware of that we don't mistaken ourselves to be like a bubble; floating and charting its own path.

We live as so called 'Social' animal whether we like it or not in this thing called life together.

But what can we do when people we love but we cannot walk anymore besides you together. The obvious answer following your own path.

But it does not need to horrible and bad, Following a different journey is okay. It is also okay if people don't like where you are going, but it will be wrong expectations to think they will applauding you or supporting you when they disagree.

If they support you, treasure and value it. I think in the world filled with images and insta-pics authenticity is like a treasure.

Being unnecessarily agreeable


I think being agreeable is a beautiful thing to achieve but there is also value in the act of being disagreeable.

Adjusting is a good thing but when it kills you and your authenticity it is overly suffocating.

I would say either of them (agreeableness or disagreeableness) should not be used unnecessarily.

I see value in rationally evaluating what is going on and responding to it. I have consciously started practicing responding to situation.

Stopping and evaluating as much as possible. Every situation  is not a life and death situation; it should not be treated as one.

Structures and projecting fears


Do we view the world the way we view ourselves? I don't know the answer to this question.

But I think it can be true sometimes, Sometimes we can have an apocalyptic impulse grips us and we think everything is in a way collapsing. May be nothing is collapsing but you are just viewing things and experiences in a different light.

Being aware of our biases and prejudices can be powerful. It can us see the difference between our perceptions of situations and what is actually happening around us.

A Quote by Alan Watts

“The meaning of life is just to be alive. It is so plain and so obvious and so simple. And yet, everybody rushes around in a great panic as if it were necessary to achieve something beyond themselves.”

― Alan Wilson Watts

Concluding Thoughts

Building a community around Self-help should not exclude the real parts of life.

My personal focus has been to share ideas that are close to my heart and I must confess it has been quite a journey.

I would like to thank you for your continued support in building this community.

You can be a part of this journey by signing up to our Newsletter or by joining the discussion on our FB Page.




Here's, How to Let go of pain in Life when you feel stuck? Chris Educator's Short guide to help you feel Free and Better

October 17, 2021
Short Guide: Letting go of pain when you feel stuck in a Situation

Hey! I missed you guys this week. My son was down with high fever. Thank goodness he is better now.

This week has been crazy, life can get you stuck sometimes. It was an opportunity to use what I preach and write about. 

I practiced a lot of stuff (Self help related, of course). I got back to researching theology and philosophy. I can spend hours studying these topics (Whilst spending time baby sitting etc.)

At some point of time we all feel let down by life or ourselves and it may not even be these things it could be a terrible situation that gets us stuck. 

For me it was my child' s health for others it may be a relationship or something else. How do we deal with these situations?

(Maybe)You can pray these away, but I will share with some powerful ideas I found out.

Here are some points I tried:

Accepting the present situation

Could this situation be an opportunity?


Accepting a situation comes when we are present and aware of what is going on. We don't need to decide the outcome mentally. It can be stressful and we may not make the best of the moment we find ourselves in.

You have options

You choose and don't let the situation dictate your choice


Do you think you are cornered or you have hit a wall? That can be a difficult situation. I have been there, I can share with you how I dealt with the problem.

I try looking at the situation objectively. Taking a note of the possible outcomes. Speaking with a friend or counsellor has personally helped.

Journaling the journey

Journaling is awesome...Write your own story!


I journal using my mobile phone. I have my phone with me all the time. Why not use it to write a note or two. It has really been useful. 

When I want to review or check how I felt at a particular situation I just browse through my notes on phone. It is that simple. If you are concerned about privacy just use an app locker.

Meditate or pray your tensions away

Lol... Ignore the Brand Mantra part


I am not trying to evangelize or anything. I think it is practical and it works. Personally, I just tune my thoughts out and close my eyes, I just lose myself in the moment, just focusing on my breath. 

It is s a relaxing experience. It refreshes me and feel energized. I pray too, it connects me with my higher purpose and puts things into perspective. 

Conclusion 

I believe life happens to all of us and we all face situations that can cripple us. 

But being there for others and yourself is important. Self care is also important to you and it can help others. 

I would like to leave you with this quote from my Twitter Feed.

I wish you an awesome week ahead and the very best. Do consider subscribe to our Newsletter... See you guys in the next blog post.

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Understanding yourself: A Quick and Practical guide to Self Introspection for building a Personal Brand

October 04, 2021

 

Self Introspection key as a tool to build Authenticity in a Personal Brand


Let me start with a Prediction, Most of you have a Facebook Account. I love Facebook and I am a fan of it.

The Best thing about it is you are connected or can connect with people who are your friends but due to a busy life or a different location you cannot connect.

Connections and Networks can be really powerful. Ask a successful Network Marketer or Business person the power and value of a Network.

People make a living of it (literally). You can leverage your Network to build a Successful business or brand.

My view of Brand or Business is not that of a person that uses his/her/zir network to suck the life of it. But rather to be a useful and reliable part of it (without being a doormat).

I believe building a Brand is like that, it is making a Promise and letting people know you can deliver on it.

Please check my Previous post on Personal Brand, where I share 6 Steps to Building a Powerful Personal Brand.

Lets look at Step 1, You are building a Personal Brand. You will have to start with you and an image or an idea of you.

A lot of us will accept that we mask our emotions at times and it is good.

But while building a brand you need to understand yourself so that you can showcase the 'Real You' you want people to understand and engage with.

The one who makes the promise to deliver a Service or Product that adds value to People.

So how does one Introspect? Do we have to prepare some kind of Questionnaire?

There are whole list of Questions. Let me break it down for you.

Experts recommend to use the following strategy while trying get a better picture of yourself.

Busting Some Myths about Personal Branding

Craft your own Brand Mantra


# Everyone is not your audience

This is one of the mistakes people make. I think we kind of assume everyone would find your content important or interesting.

It is like a movie or a song that you love and everyone else is like, 'Nah! that is crepes'.

Find your audience by focusing on niches that can be monetized.

Everyone does not like philosophy or self help, Some people do so why not focus on them.

# You don't need to meet everyone's standard

It is good to be on par with others, but sometimes we need to be clear about what we are into.

We must understand our purpose for a project or activity.  We must follow appropriate standards for the task at hand. Standards should also be implemented in a context or in  situation.

If you niche demands blog posts, see if you are following the right practices needed for a successful blog post.

# Modelling Successful influencers guarantees success

I think this is quite a fallacious thought to think that we can blindly model some Successful people and its surely going to work for everyone. 

Being successful is not following a recipe, Of Course there are established practices and techniques that do help people.

But I think these are more like guides or starting points rather than Laws of Success that cannot be broken.

# You have nothing to offer

I think this is an excuse we tell ourselves. Things or situations can be difficult to get around, but that should not stop you from achieving our goals.

Challenges make a journey more interesting. So you can focus on your positives and create a product or service that helps people.

May be you need to change the audience or the people you are selling to (some cases).

# Personal branding is one-upmanship

I think Personal Brands is about showcasing your Uniqueness and how you standout from your competition.

I don't think it is about putting people or brands down, competition doesn't need to be nasty.

Introspection and its Relation to PB

Change your world !


Where do we start is sometimes the question we all ask. Should we just blindly post pictures on Instagram or just write blogs or may be even a Book?

I don't think so, I think it is much more than that. What if all your efforts don't bear fruit? Should you just scrap it and leave it behind?

I think your purpose and goal will be a good guide to answer these questions besides an expert or consultant.

Introspection is key to authenticity, Authenticity adds value to your Personal brand.

Faking it till you make it does not mean being another person or portraying a false persona. I believe it is about portraying your potential to people. More like a symbol of what you could potentially become.

Introspection for building Authenticity

Introspection is preparing your mind for showcasing You


Introspection is key to understanding Authenticity.

We need to be clear about Who we are  and what we are offering people.

Story telling is key but authenticity builds a Strong Brand that promises Trust and Reliance to its audience.

Now before you check my other posts on Personal Branding, Let me leave you with a key to Introspection.

I would say take sometime out of your busy schedule and reflect on your dream. Try understand how it connects with your passion and how you can monetize it.

You could perform a SWOT analysis to help you understand yourself. You can see how your goals reflect you.

I would journal your thoughts and ideas regularly. On the weekends just skim through your own writings and evaluate them.

I believe this is a good starting point to be Authentic. Sometimes we  need sometime to just disconnect and connect with ourselves.

Concluding Thoughts

I believe Branding and Marketing is not about building a fake image or putting up a façade. I think it is more about serving people by being yourself.

When I speak about being yourself I believe it is about doing in a productive and smart manner.

I hope these thoughts and ideas are productive to you in understanding or building a Personal brand.

See you in the next post, Thank you for your time. Please do join the discussion on our Facebook Page!

Reference:

https://plantae.org/self-reflection-personal-branding/

https://medium.com/digital-reflections/be-the-brand-personal-branding-101-ab0f80576a00

https://cocoandcowe.com/2018/02/13/personal-branding/

https://influencermarketinghub.com/what-is-personal-branding/

https://www.capitalonecareers.com/how-to-create-your-personal-brand-divi-cdev

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/self-awareness-personal-branding-slava-noor/


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