If you believe you can't, you can't...

August 21, 2019

Learn how to be Deliberate: Christonanda Style

Being Deliberate can be like walking on a tight robe. It can feel so intimidating and discouraging. We get cold feet and just gone a loop thinking about possibilities. How do we overcome this predicament?


"My Mantra is Fuck it and Fake it."

I felt the same way a lot of time, Be it sharing my feelings with the opposite sex or receiving an award for the best teacher of the year. It just very scares for most of us. 

My Mantra is Fuck it and Fake it.

So start by telling yourself Fuck It. What it means is telling yourself that you will face the consequences. You consider the pros and cons and then move ahead. Moving ahead would mean taking action. It will mean giving it your best. Remember there are consequences to all of this. Don't think there are no repercussions.


Now Step 2, Fake it, This is how you can approach this situation. Calm down, Sit in a chair and just calm your mind, your body and your entire being. Find yourself an affirmation that can motivate you or else some gibberish would also do. When you feel anxious repeat your affirmation. Now calm down again. So are faking it now.


" Find yourself an affirmation that can motivate you "


Benefits of faking it:
  • You learn your shortcomings
  • You get feedback to improve
  • You could actually deal with issue productively.

It all sounds simple, as always believe in yourself and God. Everything will possible to those who try.


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3 Powerful ways to help you Create your daily miracles: Life's simplest things

August 20, 2019
Simple things in Life and the miracles they bring


 Being Pensive


When I get pensive and thinking about the good and bad times it's the simplest things that amaze me. Let me share, for example watching our children grow so fast and see them share their views on things can be so insightful. Life moves ahead so fast.


via GIPHY        Being Pensive: Mellow Moments

Today, I shall try to include share some ideas on Life's simplest things. How to cherish small things and how to create your small miracles of Happiness? But before I start speaking about it, Here is my favorite quote on the simple things in life. I believe it captures the beauty of simple living.

It is the simplest things in life that hold the most wonder; the color of the sea, the sand between your toes, the laughter of a child.- Goldie Hawn

Searching for the Extraordinary

I think sometimes we think doing extraordinary things can make us happy. Now I see the great wonder in simple things. All this started with the idea of choosing to be happy. When we are at our lowest we only recollect the negative and we get into a pithy party. But just shifting your attention to simple things can bring so much joy. I believe when we choose to be happy, we try to seek joy. Focusing on simple things can be a source of great joy. It's like God's hidden miracles that bring us back to our childlike wonder. It makes us smile or cry (whatever).


I once missed drowning while on a vacation. Post that experience, I realized the beauty in just being safe. The joy to interact with people and dream about possibilities. Being dead in that pool would take a lot of things away. So let's consider some ideas that can move us in that direction, towards more simple living.

3 Points can be quite an enabler to simple living:

  • Being Intentional: Intentional would mean being deliberate. So can one spend a day intentionally, Start by planning your day. Have a script for your whole day. Keep a planner or a set of tasks to plan your day. I use Google Keep or Tasks for this. It's a really great tool. Start rethinking the effectiveness of your attitudes and workstyles. Take time to pause and reflect on what tasks have you completed during the day. Reflect on how your actions have helped you grow physically, spiritually and financially. Have you been effective to your immediate friend circle or community? These could be some questions to help you focus your actions and tasks.

Reflect on how your actions have helped you grow physically, spiritually and financially. 

  • Start with Average and move ahead with excellence: Focus and perspective can really shape a lot of projects, sometimes our drive towards achieving perfection and perfect situations can cripple us. They can take away our control. To change that, Start with average, meaning average results. If you have not been able to change that habit or go on that diet 100%, no problem. Just start out and constantly improve your rate of success. Do not give up on your goals and yourself. This can be a great way to move towards achieving our goals. 

Do not give up on your goals and yourself. 

  • Learn to use the Pause button: Responding and not reacting can be useful, a great way to start being responsive could be to learn to take time to stop and think. Just using the pause button can help us rethink our approaches and attitude to difficult situations or even to learn new ideas and rejuvenate ourselves. It can be used to create those small moments to generate great ideas or even just to relax.

Responding and not reacting can be useful

Now there is another way to enjoy life's small miracles. It could be by being grateful.

Here is my list of things I am grateful for:

10 Things I grateful for ( Increase list to 10 things )

What's your Gratefulness list?

Here are some of them:
  1. Having the choice to be happy
  2. Ability to learn from difficulties
  3. The joy of having a naughty baby girl
  4. Friends and Friendships (that I cherish)
  5. Parents
  6. God
  7. Taking short vacations
  8. Shopping
  9. Ability to help someone
  10. Having a wonderful life partner

How to list simple things that touch your heart?

Now that was my list, What is your list? I have some articles on Gratitude, Check it Here. I have also written about how to create gratitude journals. I believe this is a really powerful habit as it forces us to focus and teaches us to appreciate life's simplest things.

Focusing on the simple things and uncovering its hidden joys can be a real transformative experience. I would like to share this video that shares the joy of simple living.

Interesting Video:

Here is a video that helps us understand the beauty of simple things in our life. Alain de Botton explains really well, why the simple and normal pleasures are beautiful and important.


 So let's create those small miracles and enjoy the life we have.

Concluding Thoughts

It can be so empowering to have the ability to create happiness and enjoy the wonders of the life we have been gifted. Sometimes life situations can be challenging but by hard work and using our tact and intentional living we can improve our lives and our experiences.

Please do comment, share and give your valuable feedback. Thank you. Ciao!

Further Reading

Friends and Friendship

Understanding the 'Why' behind Gratefulness
Five Easy Ways To Facilitate Gratitude Journal Styles

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Ponder Points - Being Prepared

August 09, 2019
Being Prepared


Opportunities & Difficulties

Being an Entrepreneur and working for self can be such a blessing. But Let me tell you, It has its own difficulties. Life is always filled with possibilities ( Check this article I wrote on Choices), like Napolean Hill would say that it is our lack of self-confidence that holds us back, but I would say that it is also not being prepared.

So how does one be prepared, I would say self preparedness starts with a healthy self-evaluation.


Finding your Strengths

One of the basic things that we learn in Management is a SWOT analysis. It is a topic taught under the subject of Strategic Management ( Quite an interesting topic). So basically, starts out with understanding their Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats. This is quite a good starting point, Understanding yourself or your organization. 

Spiritual Masters had their own version of it, but this happened for spiritual growth. They would evaluate their entire day and pray for people. The same can be applied or practiced, by taking a personal inventory of our entire day. Ultimately, Time is one of the greatest assets we have.

So then what next, 


How to decide your Mission? The Guy Kawasaki Way

Set a mission... and how Guy Kawasaki would do it. Set a mantra

Mantras are much more effective. Mantras summarise all that you want to do and achieve. It can be very effective as it would constantly remind us of our purpose.

Check this Youtube video, He shares with startups on the importance of having a mantra.





These techniques can also be used for our personal growth too.


Keeping a Plan B

What can be a Plan B? For an Entrepreneur, it can be another income source or leveraging a network. A Plan B can be also pursued as a hobby, It does not need to occupy all your time. 

It can be some that you love doing and are passionate about. And yes it should pay you something. Being resourceful and taking small steps can be really helpful.


Deliberately Being Prepared in 3 Simple Steps

So let us summarise some ideas on Being Prepared

  1. Understand yourself
  2. Have a Mantra
  3. What's your Plan B

Here is an interesting quote on Preparedness:


Power Quote by Louis Pasteur

Some Recommended Books: Books to keep you Prepared

Learn how to make your own plan B, I would recommend a wonderful book to help you kickstart a part-time gig or even a full-time career, it's The $100 Startup: Fire Your Boss, Do What You Love and Work Better To Live More by Chris Guillebeau and Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill. These books can really help you start, build and pursue your goals.

These links are Amazon Affiliate links, please do check the disclosure page.

So Be Prepared and Have a wonderful day! Please do Comment, Like and Share.

Further Readings:

Conduct a Personal SWOT Analysis to Improve Your Career
https://www.businessnewsdaily.com/5543-personal-swot-analysis.html

How to Be Prepared for Anything
https://zenhabits.net/survival-kit/

On Being Prepared
https://www.matthewedgar.net/on-being-prepared/


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Ponder Points - Cost of doing Nothing

July 20, 2019

Cost of Doing Nothing

I have been a subscriber to Tropical MBA for quite some time. It's an e-commerce company that focuses on Location-independent Entrepreneurship. I want to share this quote from their newsletter (do subscribe to it) Click Here!.
 “The cost of being wrong is less than the cost of doing nothing.” - Seth Godin
Do comment on How hesitation can be a deterrent to achieving our goals.

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Is Positive thinking always helpful? 5 Pitfalls you never knew to having a positive attitude

July 17, 2019
5 Pitfalls of positive thinking
What are the limitations of Positive thinking? Learn the Pros and Cons


Just be a bit more positive and things will change for you. You will achieve the stars and the moon in the sky. That's what it can be made to be by some people. Well, for some it is a better approach to approaching issues. I am talking about Positivity and Positive thinking. But one thing I learned from years of studying and learning, a lot of ideas have its limitations. In this article, I shall be exploring these negatives of Positivity,i.e. Positive Thinking. One of the best books I was asked to read was The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale. (I think for a lot of us thinking negative was like normal.) I must confess it has helped me. I was recommended by a friend's mother. The book has a lot of good ideas on how to be more positive.

But here are some ideas I believe could be limitations to Positive thinking.

List of Negatives of Positive Thinking

Ignoring the obvious

I think positive thinking can be really good, it is solution-oriented. It believes in seeing opportunities where others tend to see lack or no options. But there are limitations, one must not supplant rational thinking for make-belief (it mostly doesn't help) and can be harmful to oneself and others. So putting on a critical hat on should help us be more realistic and show us the inherent risk. I know it exposes us to a kind of uncertainty and ambiguity, but that thread of uncertainty called risk is present in any decision we make. So if positive thinking sees the cup half full, it won't magically produce the other half.

Ignoring risk can be quite risky most of the times. Calculated risks can prevent unwanted situations. I would recommend a great book to help you think clearly by Rolf Dobelli. The book is called The Art of Thinking Clearly by Rolf Dobelli. This book introduces powerful concepts in a beautiful manner. Very Interesting and helpful book. So, Clear thinking and being open to ideas must accompany positivity.

Magical Thinking

Positive thinking should not be used as some kind of force or energy. It would be wrong to think that just being positive can change the course of things. I don't think most proponents claim that positive thinking changes reality. So pretending it attracts things etc., that it would be inherently wrong, at least a practical and rational level.

Our thinking must be tempered with either evidence or experience, If not both. Please check this article on Psychology today that explores Magical Thinking in more depth, click here. Magical thinking can push towards bad choices and couple with Positive thinking, it could result in self-deception.

Self Deception

Self-deception is another negative of being overly positive. Rather than a negative its mostly stretching positive thinking beyond the purpose, it was intended for. Positive thinking has really helped me and benefitted me a lot, So using it for the right purpose is very important.

Self-deception may be beneficial, but there are surely disadvantages. That is important to be aware of, it could result in ignoring important issues and can also result in self-harm ( in case there are any health issues involved). So care and temperance are vitally important. For more reading on this topic do check this book on deception for an in-depth view, Vital Lies, Simple Truths: The Psychology of Self-Deception by Daniel Goleman. For more reading, check this article on Self Deception.

A wrong view of Reality

I think the most important thing is not having the right evaluation of reality. Some episodes in our lives can be really difficult and coping may be important. But it is important to live up to the right view of things. (that's my personal take...I know it can be painful) Critical thinking can really help.

Check this tutorial on critical thinking by Tutorialspoint, click here. Here is the wiki on Critical thinking, click here. I believe that a lack of critical thinking can create a lot of problems and thinking errors. I am not saying that all of us should go and become philosophers, but just learning a bit more can be interesting and fun. 

Some side effects you must consider...

Bad Thinking Habits:

It's my personal opinion that bad habit leads to bad consequences. Right thinking is an essential component of better living. So also over positivity, It should be tempered with critical thinking and some amount of realistic thinking too. All this is quite a mental exercise, but that's a good way to a better life.

Pointers to help on Practice Effective positivity:

Some quick pointers to Practice Effective positivity. Firstly eliminate magical thinking and false expectations. Secondly, understand that thinking is a choice and you are in control of your thoughts. It would be wrong to just be lead. Lastly, Be positive but do not mistake it for a silver bullet.

Conclusion

Positive thinking is a great approach to enhancing ourselves and our lives. Like many good ideas, it can be misused and should not be. Healthy rationalism and critical thinking can help us make better decisions.

I hope you liked this article. Please comment and share it, thank you.

Further Reading:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/creativity-and-personal-mastery/201004/why-positive-thinking-is-bad-you

https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/blogs/O-zone/the-negatives-of-positive-thinking/

https://greatist.com/happiness/positive-thinking-negative-benefits

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950

https://greatist.com/happiness/positive-thinking-negative-benefits

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Friends and Friendship

July 15, 2019

Friends and Friendship


 Friends are like companions that journey with you till they reach their destinations. It would be unimaginable to live without them. I used to have little to few friends, A lot of great books and ideas helped me along the way.

Developing yourself is a life long process and I think friendships can really play a key role in it. The positive side of social networking is the power to connect quite easily, of course, there are many articles on the side effects of it. But we must not forget the benefits too.
It's great having friends.


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Daily Steps

July 14, 2019
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