Importance of Emotional Quotient and Benefits of working on it

As an Educator, I have seen Parents really sweat about their children not performing. I think it is important to perform well in exams and in academics in general. But I really appreciate that over the years a lot of students have been encouraged to also focus on building themselves as individuals.

Simple Skills like Listening and Expressing oneself is so Important. A healthy and vibrant education system should also work on building the emotional Life of a person. Working on building ones EQ is as important as IQ.

As an Introvert or to be precise as an Introvert who does seem like one, The concept of Emotional Quotient can be a very useful tool in understanding oneself and others. It helps one see the importance of Feelings and subjective thinking in the way we understand life, concepts and also ourselves.

What is EQ?

Understanding ourselves and others

As a student of Management and Psychology, I would like to explore the concept of EQ. Emotional Quotient is a concept I learnt when I read a book by Daniel Goleman by the same name. My Uncle introduced me to this concept and Its quite a powerful tool.

A textbook definition of Emotional Quotient reads as "It is the ability to be in control emotions of oneself, others or a group". So as the definition suggests it can help you understand yourself and others. Like any ability practice and good understanding of the related concepts and exercises will help you get a better grasp on it. 

Let me share an experience of how EQ helped me, I pursued an MBA as I was interested in understanding how big and impossible tasks could be managed very successfully and seemingly easily. 

It really motivated me to pursue management as a subject. But I understood that besides understanding Management and related topics, I needed to express myself. The introvertedness was not the problem, Though I thought it was.

I needed to present myself and do public speaking. This really made me scared. After reflecting on the problem I understood that rather than introvertedness, it was shyness that was the issue. 

I began to see that I never knew of techniques and methods to deliver a good speech. Some people had these abilities naturally, for me it was not a part of my mental make. To make a long story short I had to learn Public speaking and really enjoyed my MBA.

Sometimes we don't realise that understanding ourselves can also help us in dealing with issues and it also helps us in helping others.

Emotional Quotient or even building your Intelligence requires constant working. So do grab the Book by Daniel Goleman  (Not an Affiliate Link...I don't earn anything on this link) on this topic for a thorough study on the topic.

But to share in brief some quick ideas on EQ, Some important components of EQ would be Self awareness, Self Management, Social awareness and Relationship management.

Self Awareness would be trying to understand one's thinking and moods.

Self management would be recognising your own emotions and how they affect others.

Social Awareness as the name suggest will focus on how we build rapport with others. So that would mean things like understanding others, learning to be socially comfortable etc.

Lastly Relationship Management will deal with building good relationships. This has many personal and work related applications.

As you can see this is a really powerful concept. Now let's jump into why this matters and how this is going to help you. Before I continue I am not getting any Affiliate Mullah or Money for promoting this book. It's just that the book is really useful.

The Benefits

Benefits of EQ

Key Tools for building a Strong EQ

FEAR- False Expectations Appearing Real

Conclusion

Life beyond Boredom

Practicing Resourcefulness

• Create a Blog
• Learn video editing
• Create your first Vlog
• Watch some interesting TED talk videos
• Write a business plan
• Do some free courses online
• Try some of the D.I.Y. recipes you see on Facebook
• Pick up some culinary skills
• Review videos on YouTube and post them
• Share my articles & like my Facebook Page
• Give positive feedback to people who made a difference in your life
• Stay at home and meditate
• Read books on Investments and Entrepreneurship
• Play Indoor Games
• Doodle and post them on Instagram
• Clean your cupboards and tidy up your room
• Do Binge watching (YouTube & Netflix)
• Catch up on some conspiracy theories
• Yoga
• Listen to Music
• Explore Reddit

Context and Backstory matter in communication and Life

In an argument, Have you had the feeling that you have been misunderstood?

Do you feel like you have been misrepresented? The reason is all about context and perspective (in most cases).

I would like to speak about context. A good communicator is the one who gets his message across effectively.

The effectiveness of good communication can be different for different people. But primarily it is about getting the message across.

When we are communicating and people misunderstand us it could be for many reasons, but setting the context is an important part of Effective Communication.

Context is important in Communication

So whether you are listening to someone or responding to someone, to understand them better we must get the context right.

So Besides being loud and clear in your speech and words, set the context right to communicate better.

Life and Dogma

I just came across this quote from Steve Jobs, " Don't be trapped by Dogma...". This got me thinking about Dogma from a Religious sphere and personal growth related sphere they were the same and different both at the same time. In the Religious sphere ( I am referring to Christianity, that is my belief system), it is based on God-given revelation, so logically it cannot be contradicted as God ( All perfect being is revealing it), but the dogmas that we carry about things in our lives or we may say related to personal growth are not revelation and therefore can be replaced. 

Your own experience matters

We may come up with better ideas and ways of looking at things. Sometimes we can get so caught up in other People's experiences that we can hold our selves back from experiencing it ourselves. So like in Religion we need to build our own reservoir of personal experience and learning to grow. We must build ourselves by daily succeeding or failing.

Being Guru or Sophist

Some days ago I was watching a video critiquing a major Internet guru. I won't name him, because I do respect him and I learned a lot of ideas from him. People say he is a scam because his courses are exorbitant and they do not produce the result as they imagined it. This kind of criticism really makes me think whether skills and growth are achieved only in a day, a year or a couple of months.

It is so easy to speak badly about people, but the fact is that Personal growth is a Personal Responsibility.

Importance of Trying

I believe like anything it requires constant learning, application and course correction to achieve positive results.

Imagine if you are learning acting professionally and expect to become a thorough actor overnight it is senseless. Of course, there are prodigies, but the rule for the rest of us is to constantly work at ourselves and learn more so that we can move further down the road to self-development.

The relevance of Healthy criticism

I would like to say that criticism is essential but also healthy appreciation can go a long way. There are a lot of wolves in sheep's clothing ( Fake gurus or Charlatans ) and we must practice critical thinking, but not applying what you learn and not keeping healthy expectations is not healthy and not realistic as well.

In Short

Be Real, Keep Learning and Try it out, If it works for you try to get better at it.

Keep checking this space for more articles. Do join our community on Facebook and share this insight with a friend.

Photo by Rebrand Cities from Pexels

My love for Theater and Drama

Theater and drama have always been my passion. Years back when Orkut was a thing I joined a Theatre group. I met this guy online and he was very passionate about drama and cinema. So I got in touch with him. He informed me, he was starting a drama club. I met this group of theater enthusiasts. 

We all shared the same passion and more importantly we all valued cinema and drama. We would read scripts together and also do drama. We did a couple of plays at various corporate events and also organized our own Theater play. It was simply amazing. 

So Why am I tell you all this? Its to share an important decision I had to make. The decision of leaving this wonderful drama club. They were going to be different by taking a new route and at that juncture in my journey towards learning more about drama, I felt that I wanted something different for myself. 

So I left and informed that the reason why I could not continue and be a part of their group. My values and vision had changed.

Keeping the important things important

So I joined another theater group, I would practice and watch plays every weekend. The fun continued. What I realized from the entire experience is the importance of aligning work and values. I valued learning and did not want to compromise it.

 My values were like pillars supporting my ultimate goal. I wanted to be a better communicator and educator. It really helped me develop myself and my skillset. A lot of times we don't enjoy our work and this could be for various reasons. I believe one strong reason could be a lack of alignment between goals, values and the work you are doing.

 So aligning them can bring a lot of changes and it can also help you leave a mark not only on your work but also on others.

Enthusiasm and Being an awesome Influencer

During my stint as an Executive with various companies, I loved the experience of working in teams. I shared the same joy in Academics. 

It was amazing to see students succeed in their events, project and other endeavors. I believe it was that shared enthusiasm and values that helped them succeed. Some of the students would become really popular without even trying. 

They were able to lead and influence a lot of team members and colleagues. The way they worked and presented themselves as one of the reasons they had a successful image. 

Importance of Personal Branding to your job

In the day and age of Social Network, Personal image can play a vital role. Presentation of self and our opinions do matter. To think that it doesn't, wouldn't be wise. So I believe it all starts with ourselves. The way we present ourselves depends a lot on our values and how passionate we are about the things that we work and live for.

If we do not enjoy our work, it shows. You may be paid the same, but you could be affecting other things like Personal Brand value. Two questions come to mind when we hear about Personal Branding. 

What is it?
Is it important?

Personal Branding is the practice of using branding and marketing for a person and not for a product or service or business. So let me first explain branding and how it is different from marketing before getting into using it for a person or self. 

Brand refers to the symbol, name, term or design that identifies one product from all other products. So Branding would be the process of creating a brand. 

On the other hand, Marketing involves satisfying customers' wants profitably. So these techniques when applied to ourselves properly can help us grow in our careers. It can help us explore ourselves effectively.

How big Brands influence and how to model them?

One important thing about brands is that they promise something and they deliver them quickly and effectively. They do so through careful planning and execution. So the question is how can we do the same? How can we brand ourselves? 

As employees, we make promises at our workplace. It is important to keep those promises. This can be the first step. We must stand for something, some we must deliver on words quickly. This should not only reflect in our words, but also in our work.

Big brands take measured steps and tie metrics to judge their effectiveness. We should set standards for ourselves as professionals. 

There is a whole lot of steps involved but what guides and keeps the flame of passion for good work going. It is our values and yes, our vision. Focus cannot come without a goal or a vision. One cannot achieve their vision or goals without having the values and passion to carry one through the tough times and difficult situations.

One simple mantra for enjoying your work and leaving a mark is to stick to your values and deliver on your words. Let values build and help to burn the flames of passionate work. Leave a mark by keeping your promises.

Falling for anything

This reminds of a cliche that goes like this, "If You Don’t Stand for Something, You’ll Fall for Anything." When you stand for anything you won't be easily remembered. 

Most of the icons we look up to, may it be technology, religion, politics or culture, they all stood for something. They lived their message and mostly delivered them. Its time to do the same and standout.

Some simple ways to Building a Personal Brand at your workplace

• Promise and deliver
• Plan and measure the execution of your plan
• Let your goals and visions drive your promises
• Use your values effectively

I hope this article got you thinking, does help you and get you thinking. Do leave a comment and share this article.

Further Reading

Personal Branding Tips
Personal branding in the workplace
Wiki on Personal Branding

Opportunities & Difficulties

Being an Entrepreneur and working for self can be such a blessing. But Let me tell you, It has its own difficulties. Life is always filled with possibilities ( Check this article I wrote on Choices), like Napolean Hill would say that it is our lack of self-confidence that holds us back, but I would say that it is also not being prepared.

So how does one be prepared, I would say self preparedness starts with a healthy self-evaluation.

Finding your Strengths

One of the basic things that we learn in Management is a SWOT analysis. It is a topic taught under the subject of Strategic Management ( Quite an interesting topic). So basically, starts out with understanding their Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats. This is quite a good starting point, Understanding yourself or your organization. 

Spiritual Masters had their own version of it, but this happened for spiritual growth. They would evaluate their entire day and pray for people. The same can be applied or practiced, by taking a personal inventory of our entire day. Ultimately, Time is one of the greatest assets we have.

So then what next, 

How to decide your Mission? The Guy Kawasaki Way

Set a mission... and how Guy Kawasaki would do it. Set a mantra. 

Mantras are much more effective. Mantras summarise all that you want to do and achieve. It can be very effective as it would constantly remind us of our purpose.

Check this Youtube video, He shares with startups on the importance of having a mantra.

These techniques can also be used for our personal growth too.

Keeping a Plan B

What can be a Plan B? For an Entrepreneur, it can be another income source or leveraging a network. A Plan B can be also pursued as a hobby, It does not need to occupy all your time. 

It can be some that you love doing and are passionate about. And yes it should pay you something. Being resourceful and taking small steps can be really helpful.

So let us summarise some ideas on Being Prepared

1. Understand yourself
2. Have a Mantra
3. What's your Plan B

Here is an interesting quote on Preparedness:

Power Quote by Louis Pasteur

 Friends are like companions that journey with you till they reach their destinations. It would be unimaginable to live without them. I used to have little to few friends, A lot of great books and ideas helped me along the way.

Developing yourself is a life long process and I think friendships can really play a key role in it. The positive side of social networking is the power to connect quite easily, of course, there are many articles on the side effects of it. But we must not forget the benefits too.
It's great having friends.

A Good Start*

Creating Dreams

Finding Gaps

Being Aplomb

Failing to Plan